The Long-Awaited Pre-Construction Meeting

(Yes, we are starting our house on Friday the Thirteenth.)

Today we had our “pre-construction meeting.” We met the guy who will supervise everyone who is actually going to build our house. Then we tramped all over our lot. There isn’t much to look at yet, just stakes: this stake is the edge of your property, this is the front corner of your house, your driveway will be over here. It was very muddy. So, now we are both very muddy, and so are our car mats! Once the lot dries out a bit, they will level it off again and start building our house. So, please pray for no rain for a week or so. (Or cross your fingers, or light a candle, or rub a magic lamp, or whatever your preferred method might be.)

The first step will be to dig a hole where the house will be. Yes, they have to level the land so they can . . . dig a hole in the middle. Clearly, I don’t understand the building process very well, because this makes no sense to me. Then the hole will be inspected. Yes, really. (“Yep, that’s a hole.”) Then they will put iron bars into the hole. Then they will pour concrete, which will be the foundation of our house. Then the plumber will lay pipes. Then more concrete.

Yes, our house will have slab construction, not a crawl space. One of my students, who works in construction, told me that a slab house is a piece of crap and you just shouldn’t even bother to build one. (He LOVED giving me construction advice, since it was fun for him to know more than the teacher did about SOMETHING.) I am now trying to not hyperventilate thinking about that bit of advice. What if something goes wrong with the pipes? Will they be buried inside the concrete? How will they fix them? Won’t they freeze that way in winter? If they leak, will our whole house crumble?

Okay, I will try to look on the bright side: slab construction is generally safer in an earthquake (yep, looooots of those in Indiana!) and cheaper and faster to build. You also have almost no chance of having a rabid skunk crawl under your house and die in the depths of the crawl space. That’s a definite plus. We also upgraded to thicker carpet padding so the floor won’t feel hard and cold, even though it is concrete. Something I have always wondered: what is the difference between concrete and cement? Does one have sand in it??? Gee, sounds like it is time to bother the nice reference librarians at our local library.

We did learn today that our house will have the garage on the right hand side of the house (if you are standing in the street facing the house.) So the kitchen will be on the right hand side, too, and the bedrooms will be on the left. This is the reverse of the model home, so I am having a hard time adjusting my mental image. It is, however, the same as the floor plan shown farther down on this page. We didn’t get to pick the orientation of the house, apparently the engineers pick it. I don’t know how they decide. Do they examine the entrails of sheep or something? Maybe the entrails of an old computer? Our house will face north, which means the garage will be on the north side (hopefully insulating the house from cold winds.) So, our back yard will face south, which should extend the growing and grilling seasons a bit. Our house will be about 15 feet from the neighbor’s house on each side. That seems awfully close, but it doesn’t look that bad when you look at the houses that are already finished. And the windows are very carefully placed so you won’t be looking out your window directly into the neighbor’s house. Maybe we will eventually be able to plant pampas grass or something to give a sense of separation. The neighborhood association rules say you can’t put a fence there, you can only fence off your back yard, not the side yards. And it has to be a cute fence, of an approved type. Yeah, whatever. As long as the fence can contain an energetic dachshund.

We also learned our new address: 1549 West Meeting House Lane. Doesn’t that sound nicer than Lot #356? I better order some return address labels! I still think “Meeting House” is an odd name for a street. Do they have a computer generate names for streets? I actually think the names of housing divisions are a form of that game, Mad Libs. You know: insert adjective here, name a kind of tree, add a British-sounding word: Sweet Pine Glen, Far Oaks Estates, Green Elm Shire. My all time favorite stupid name for a housing division is in Wichita, Kansas, near where my parents live. It is called “Turtle Run.” Turtles don’t run anywhere! And turtles are not exactly an aristocratic sort of animal, are they? Cute, but not really expensive or noble. And a “run” really sounds more like part of a dog kennel than a place to live. The apartment complex where we live now is called “Steeplechase.” Apparently that is a kind of horse race, so they were going for the snobby polo-pony association. Most people think it is named after the huge church right next door (which, by the way, doesn’t even have a steeple.) I don’t think the name quite carries the connotation they hoped for. Should have stuck with the Mad Libs: Calm Ash Mansions, Bright Palm Lakes, Quite Birch Brook, or something like that.

Thank you all for your contributions to our blog. So far, our favorite advice is from Derek’s dad: have lots of food and beer and wine for your helpers, but only give it to them AFTER they finish work. Is that to ensure that they actually do the work, or to ensure they are sober enough not to drop your grandmother’s antique lamp? Either way, sounds like good advice to me.